Having some time to think, I realize that recently I have been carrying around so much hurt with me. Yes, my mother passed away almost 3 years ago, but I still hurt each and every day. Some of those things have been much more evident to me as I look at people around me. Especially, when others around me experience those same types of loss and they seem to be recognized more than what I was. Yes, there was 'some' recognition. A few of those closest to me who expressed how much they cared and showed me concern by simply asking me how I was doing or sending me a few notes of encouragements but, I think my expectations of others around me to keep talking to me was just too high because I created that wall.
So high, that I set myself up for a world of hurts, rejection and backing away to the point of becoming someone whom I am not. Someone who - is unapproachable. Yes, I have been a little unapproachable. I have been hurt by those around me. I have chosen to shut them out and suffer my grief in silence. This has not been the best course of action, granted. That is who I am when I am feeling so lost in my own loss.
I am not fake, but feel as though I have been, many times because I have tried to force myself to be happy. I think I must take things a little personally. People around me just haven't been allowed into my inner life to know the hurt and pain of the loss I have had. It has been harder each and every time that I am reminded of this loss. I am not trying to be selfish or want some vanity for myself, I just want to not hurt. I want those around me to know how much I care and how much I hurt.
Not everyone will experience loss the same way (and granted losing 7 people you know in 3 years in quite a bit), but my loss includes those that I obviously have known for a long time. My mom of 78 years, my grandfather of 99 years, my uncle of 70, other cousins and friends alike. Any loss is never easy and we each have a way of dealing with it, but I think I should feel like I am over this. It takes time.....I know. I am aware of these things, but when it happens to others and they seem to be recognized and coddled or called out more than what I felt like, just brings back to me the hurts and loss of that death over, and over again. I don't want to hurt any more. Just to be healed and whole. I know that this too will pass, I know that I will not feel like this forever. But the expectation that you have and what actually happens are just so different. Maybe I opened myself up to something that was so unattainable for myself that I have actually let myself not have the proper time to see my loss as just that - a loss!
I will be whole again and in heaven with those I love and know that they don't want me to hurt in this way and that God is the only one who will bring me healing through all of this. I needed to recognize that I have suffered a loss, a hurt that only God will be able to heal. This is not forever and I will let him handle this for me as I work through all of those things. I will move forward toward all those things, with time and hurts set aside, but I have to move on from all those things. I know that I need to be away from that and just forgive those who have hurt me in such a way they will not ever understand because they are not me and cannot see what they have or have not done. Forgiveness is just as much a part of my healing process as forgetting all of those hurts that I have seen and continue to see each day.
In peace and love,
Shirley - I choose to forgive!
Sunday, March 15, 2015
Sunday, December 28, 2014
BOVENKERK ANNUAL COLD-WEATHER CHRISTMAS LETTER 2014
I
pray that this annual letter finds everyone in great anticipation of the coming
of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We
look forward to this season when we can remember and draw strength from Him for
the coming time of His arrival.
A TIME TO DECIDE! - Will he, or won’t he? Christopher has gone through a major change and this was the decision he had to make…’Will he, or won’t he?’ What? You may ask. The answer. Throw his entire family into turmoil (more like himself) on the thought of leaving Wal-Mart after….wait for it….17 Long and arduous, stressful, long, frustrating YEARS!! And yes, we said long twice because it was!
After one day saying, yes he will and the next saying, no he won’t, he finally made the grand decision to leave Wal-Mart management for good. And then, instead of being a gigolo and sponging off his wife and kids, he decided to get a job…oh wait, they already asked him the day he put his application on-line. What is he doing you might wonder? Well….first of all here is his e-mail address: cbovenkerk@ft.newyorklife.com... No, really….just send him a note. He has ventured out and spread his wings and said, “What the heck am I doing now?” Then he became the superhero of the Life and health insurance world. (Along with annuities, long-term care, college funding and the like) SERIOUSLY, he really has.
His stress level has dropped a little too much and we aren’t too sure if it has more to do with the job-change or his meds. (We might think the latter, but only he really knows.) It was great to finally have him at home the day AFTER Thanksgiving to enjoy the frenzied activity of ‘Black Friday’. And he truly enjoyed it….time with the family was worth the day. So, if you need someone to take a look at your insurance, just give him a call and he’ll be sure to hook you up to see how much your life is worth.
Shirley is still working at two different churches….the biggest decision she gets to make now is where to put the desk in her new office, once they get through building a new church. Yes, there are new plans in works to build a new United Methodist church here in Carmi. It is big news since they have been working on trying to get a vote passed to build a new church for nearly 20 years. (You know, small town speed)
The great thing about small colleges is that Jessica is SO smart, she decided to join the Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society. We are proud of her for that. (As Katharine adds, ‘Aren’t you proud of me for working with drug abusers?’) **Please see attached. So, at the bequest of someone unnamed, Jessica thought that the next best decision was to try and be Beauty Queen, or I mean, “Miss Gallatin County”. The next question now is, “where can she sign up for Toddlers and Tiaras?”
Remodel of the upstairs (small) bathroom has started and is still going on...and on…and on... (and Jessica is still bothered about that), which is also helps feed the “Don’t Look” comments held by the youngest of all. The decision to finish will start soon. Next…the kitchen….OH, I’M OVERWHELMED ALREADY. One too many decisions for this moment. (Shaking our heads – SOH, LOL) *See attached acronym list. – Please send suggestions to us at this time, thank you.
Chris & Shirley decided they needed a much-deserved vacation from the kids and ran off to Cape Girardeau, MO. In case you didn’t know, this is where they filmed the movie ‘Gone Girl’. It was interesting to see it on the big screen literally 3 days after we were there. Katharine was sad that she didn’t meet Ben Affleck or know they were in the same she was, or really mostly sad about not meeting Ben. Aka the ‘hottie’. And speaking of ‘big screens’, we went the store to look at bigger*** TVs than the current 23” in the house, and came home with one that 55” and is ‘smart’ (and almost smarter than the kids and computer, which keeps shutting down). New computer next?? Please send funds now (the TV was too much, jk). Well, the decisions for this year have all been made. Bring on 2k15. By next year our dogs (and Katharine) may learn to spell. No guarantees.
A TIME TO DECIDE! - Will he, or won’t he? Christopher has gone through a major change and this was the decision he had to make…’Will he, or won’t he?’ What? You may ask. The answer. Throw his entire family into turmoil (more like himself) on the thought of leaving Wal-Mart after….wait for it….17 Long and arduous, stressful, long, frustrating YEARS!! And yes, we said long twice because it was!
After one day saying, yes he will and the next saying, no he won’t, he finally made the grand decision to leave Wal-Mart management for good. And then, instead of being a gigolo and sponging off his wife and kids, he decided to get a job…oh wait, they already asked him the day he put his application on-line. What is he doing you might wonder? Well….first of all here is his e-mail address: cbovenkerk@ft.newyorklife.com... No, really….just send him a note. He has ventured out and spread his wings and said, “What the heck am I doing now?” Then he became the superhero of the Life and health insurance world. (Along with annuities, long-term care, college funding and the like) SERIOUSLY, he really has.
His stress level has dropped a little too much and we aren’t too sure if it has more to do with the job-change or his meds. (We might think the latter, but only he really knows.) It was great to finally have him at home the day AFTER Thanksgiving to enjoy the frenzied activity of ‘Black Friday’. And he truly enjoyed it….time with the family was worth the day. So, if you need someone to take a look at your insurance, just give him a call and he’ll be sure to hook you up to see how much your life is worth.
Shirley is still working at two different churches….the biggest decision she gets to make now is where to put the desk in her new office, once they get through building a new church. Yes, there are new plans in works to build a new United Methodist church here in Carmi. It is big news since they have been working on trying to get a vote passed to build a new church for nearly 20 years. (You know, small town speed)
After
Katharine decided to abandon her parents, home and “bed” (which became an air
mattress) for the summer break (from school in Missouri), she decided to run
her good old, gold convertible into a bright yellow pole that itself decided
NOT to move and did quite a bit of damage, not worth fixing. We had to make an unexpected trip to retrieve
her from Springfield, MO where she was staying for the summer and bring her home
(Jessica is sad – she was supposed to get her chance to drive in style in the
convertible)….luckily it was just a couple of days before her grandparents
(Warren & Arvella) arrived from California for a much needed vacation. During her time home, and with some help from
others, she decided to buy a brand new Chevy Sonic so now she is riding around style
in her digs near Evangel University. She
LOVES all the features of new technology in her own car (from hands-free phone
calling to an actual CD player and OnStar.) Oh, by the way, she tells us, “At
least my scooter isn’t on fire” (this is what the cops said to her when they
found her car wrapped around the pole.)
Katharine
gave us a scare after school started back this fall when she called us and said,
“I’m in the emergency room”. Of course, all tests have come back negative for
all things related to Katharine. She is
quite the little mystery. Her next big
decision is where, and when she will be going or living after graduation in
May, 2015. She may continue to work with
those ‘clients’ after being with them all summer. She did turn 21 this year and is now a …how
shall we put this lightly, an alcoholic…..oh we mean ‘WORK-A-HOLIC’ She
definitely needs AA. Rather WA since she already attends AA weekly at her
“internship”. At least now she knows her
name! “Hi, my name is Catherin and I’m an intern”. We always knew she could say it!
Jessica….oh
Jessica, what can we say about Jessica….. Her decision was to run home from
North Central College to Mommy and Daddy and live and go to school
locally….only, for one year….She has decided to go BACK TO NORTH CENTRAL….
After we asked her if that’s what she should be doing when she came home!!!!
Silly girl. She still has decided to
stay the course of photography and being a multi-media guru, i.e. Snapchat,
FaceBook, FaceTime, Twitter, Instagram, etc. so if you need to get hold of
her….just ask and you find her EVERYWHERE!!!
We
kept taking early morning trips once a month to the train station to get Jessica
from school in Chicago, just because….No really, she just couldn’t make up her
mind if she wanted to be home where it was warm or to just come home to get
warm. At the end of June she decided
Florida might thaw her out more so she took a trip and instead, got SUNBURNED –
1st degree mind you. The sun
officially scarred her for life! She is
still thawing out today.
The great thing about small colleges is that Jessica is SO smart, she decided to join the Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society. We are proud of her for that. (As Katharine adds, ‘Aren’t you proud of me for working with drug abusers?’) **Please see attached. So, at the bequest of someone unnamed, Jessica thought that the next best decision was to try and be Beauty Queen, or I mean, “Miss Gallatin County”. The next question now is, “where can she sign up for Toddlers and Tiaras?”
Joshua
has decided that his time is best spent trying to make money by working as a
McDonald’s expert at McDonald’s (he is only 15), so that he can pay for all his
GAMES. He decides to spend time on the Xbox360. We only see him when he’s hungry or runs down
the hallway YELLING, “Don’t Look!!” He
has now entered the grand stage of driving….the last one! And he thinks he
knows it all…typical teenager.
Allie
and Baby, aka – THE DOGS, are still figuring out ‘who rules the roost around
here’. Three-pound Baby shows her
dominance (or tries) by choosing to crawl on top of Allie while she is in
laying in her rightful bed. And Allie looking at us like, “So, you really are
letting her do this to me?!” To prove
who still rules the roost, Allie still looks to us as the actual rulers of the
roost, to get her ‘annoyance’ out of her bed on occasion.
Baby
accurately represents her namesake while whining and crying, pooping and peeing
and begging to be held ALL THE TIME!!
However, she’s become quite old and decided to displace a disk in her
back and continues to act like a Baby.
Trent,
Shirley’s brother, decided that he needed to get married in the small-town of
Carmi, IL in May this year, instead of the mosquito capital of the US, Alaska –
not sure about that but, He, Dawna and family from all over flew (or drove, or
rode in on a moose, or dog-sledded) in to help them make this life-long
decision. It was a grand affair attended
by all, including their father and his newest flame, Annette. It would seem that he met her while doing a
jig that impressed her so much that she decided to tag along and meet the
entire family in one week.
Remodel of the upstairs (small) bathroom has started and is still going on...and on…and on... (and Jessica is still bothered about that), which is also helps feed the “Don’t Look” comments held by the youngest of all. The decision to finish will start soon. Next…the kitchen….OH, I’M OVERWHELMED ALREADY. One too many decisions for this moment. (Shaking our heads – SOH, LOL) *See attached acronym list. – Please send suggestions to us at this time, thank you.
Chris & Shirley decided they needed a much-deserved vacation from the kids and ran off to Cape Girardeau, MO. In case you didn’t know, this is where they filmed the movie ‘Gone Girl’. It was interesting to see it on the big screen literally 3 days after we were there. Katharine was sad that she didn’t meet Ben Affleck or know they were in the same she was, or really mostly sad about not meeting Ben. Aka the ‘hottie’. And speaking of ‘big screens’, we went the store to look at bigger*** TVs than the current 23” in the house, and came home with one that 55” and is ‘smart’ (and almost smarter than the kids and computer, which keeps shutting down). New computer next?? Please send funds now (the TV was too much, jk). Well, the decisions for this year have all been made. Bring on 2k15. By next year our dogs (and Katharine) may learn to spell. No guarantees.
Love and Peace,
The Bovenkerk’s
Chris, Shirley, Katharine, Jessica,
Joshua
(And the dogs – Allie and Baby)
*SMH,
LOL (we don’t know either)
***and
by bigger, we mean 3 times the size
P.S: When do we get our own reality TV
show? We promise it won’t be called “Here comes the Bobobovenkerk’s” or “The
Dutch Dynasty”.
P.P.S: Disclaimer- we cannot verify the
authenticity of any of the above actions and/or facts and statements. The only thing we promise, is that this
letter will not be written next year on the Sunday before Christmas.Thursday, March 13, 2014
Who cares?
I pose this question after many, many months of soul searching. Wondering if it is just me, or if things have just changed around me and I recognize it more. I try searching for answers only to come to the same conclusion. There isn't anyone who genuinely cares about anyone else. I say this because of some of my own interactions with others.
Oh, I know, I could go into a lot of detail about a lot of things but, that only brings about hurt, anger, pain and more confusion. So in keeping with things that are supposed to be 'christian' I am not going to keep a log of all that sort of stuff (I already have a full dufflebag that needs to be emptied). I am just going to put it all aside and pray. Pray that I am able to gain more insight into what my real purpose is here and if there are people around me who truly do care.
I am trying to get involved in lives of others around me, but seem to have many, many doors shut in my face or just left wide opened and not answered. I am not allowed to become close to those in my community because I am seen as an outsider. This is true of so many small towns where one person can be related to at least 1,000 others in the area. So, in offending one, you in essence offend all of them and if you speak badly about one of them and so on.
Church offers me no better solutions to this problem either. There is truly only so much that one person can do when they ask to be involved in things that are of interest to them, or to just plain out and out ask to be involved to have no follow-up given or just kind of be brushed off like you never said anything at all about your interest or involvement in that project or what not. That being said, there are those who hurt feelings even without any regard to thinking that you were ever asking to be involved. It does hurt and you do feel rejected when those kinds of things happen. And then when you act differently, they say something to someone else who has nothing to do with any of it and what do you say. You really can't because they just wouldn't understand.
That is just plain frustrating. People in a small church don't need to rely just on a few to fill the role of many. This just doesn't work and sure makes others feel pretty alone when the only times you call or make contact is when you want something from them. That is pretty lonely to have a life that doesn't exist except inside the walls of the building. Then I really don't want anything to do with them at all because if that is the way I am treated, I certainly don't want to be part of that. It does give 'Christianity' a really bad name and leaves a really rotten taste in your mouth.
I am so frustrated with all of this and certainly cannot begin to express how I am feeling to them because they would simply say that I don't try hard enough or that its not true. How do they know?? Are they really checking up on me? Certainly not! Any friends there? NO! Anyone care that I don't come? Nope again! Does it really matter that I do or don't come? No and No! Sometimes the pain of that is so real.....I have tried to involve myself, but what I believe that my ministry is and what I have a passion for are not part of what this body is tied to. Those things are beyond where I feel that my calling is. This is stifling and limiting me. I am quite nearly at my wits end of trying to just fit in.
All I have asked for is someone who will be willing to ask me to be involved, a follow-up to a question or an acknowledgment that is not something fake or forced just because it has to be done. I, just like everyone else I know, like to be appreciated for who I am, what I can contribute and what I have that is an offering to make things work better. But that too seems like something that is never going to happen. I can't make people like me. I can't make people want my cell number, I can't make people reach out to me. I try to and get rejected. On so many levels....I am just hurt!
I don't have much to say to them, they are not who I thought they were and this isn't where I belong any more.
Sadly,
Alone
Oh, I know, I could go into a lot of detail about a lot of things but, that only brings about hurt, anger, pain and more confusion. So in keeping with things that are supposed to be 'christian' I am not going to keep a log of all that sort of stuff (I already have a full dufflebag that needs to be emptied). I am just going to put it all aside and pray. Pray that I am able to gain more insight into what my real purpose is here and if there are people around me who truly do care.
I am trying to get involved in lives of others around me, but seem to have many, many doors shut in my face or just left wide opened and not answered. I am not allowed to become close to those in my community because I am seen as an outsider. This is true of so many small towns where one person can be related to at least 1,000 others in the area. So, in offending one, you in essence offend all of them and if you speak badly about one of them and so on.
Church offers me no better solutions to this problem either. There is truly only so much that one person can do when they ask to be involved in things that are of interest to them, or to just plain out and out ask to be involved to have no follow-up given or just kind of be brushed off like you never said anything at all about your interest or involvement in that project or what not. That being said, there are those who hurt feelings even without any regard to thinking that you were ever asking to be involved. It does hurt and you do feel rejected when those kinds of things happen. And then when you act differently, they say something to someone else who has nothing to do with any of it and what do you say. You really can't because they just wouldn't understand.
That is just plain frustrating. People in a small church don't need to rely just on a few to fill the role of many. This just doesn't work and sure makes others feel pretty alone when the only times you call or make contact is when you want something from them. That is pretty lonely to have a life that doesn't exist except inside the walls of the building. Then I really don't want anything to do with them at all because if that is the way I am treated, I certainly don't want to be part of that. It does give 'Christianity' a really bad name and leaves a really rotten taste in your mouth.
I am so frustrated with all of this and certainly cannot begin to express how I am feeling to them because they would simply say that I don't try hard enough or that its not true. How do they know?? Are they really checking up on me? Certainly not! Any friends there? NO! Anyone care that I don't come? Nope again! Does it really matter that I do or don't come? No and No! Sometimes the pain of that is so real.....I have tried to involve myself, but what I believe that my ministry is and what I have a passion for are not part of what this body is tied to. Those things are beyond where I feel that my calling is. This is stifling and limiting me. I am quite nearly at my wits end of trying to just fit in.
All I have asked for is someone who will be willing to ask me to be involved, a follow-up to a question or an acknowledgment that is not something fake or forced just because it has to be done. I, just like everyone else I know, like to be appreciated for who I am, what I can contribute and what I have that is an offering to make things work better. But that too seems like something that is never going to happen. I can't make people like me. I can't make people want my cell number, I can't make people reach out to me. I try to and get rejected. On so many levels....I am just hurt!
I don't have much to say to them, they are not who I thought they were and this isn't where I belong any more.
Sadly,
Alone
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
Meanderings
After such a long time away, there has been many changes that have occurred. On July 4th was the first anniversary of my mom's death. It was an ok time. But since that time, I have struggled with many things. The loss of others in my family, along with a major surgery have left me with many thoughts that aren't great! We lost my uncle, who was diagnosed with a type of lymphatic leukemia around the same time my mom was diagnosed with her cancer. Also we lost my beloved grandpa, who was a spry 98 years young. Both on the same day and within 18 hours of each other! This was all only in God's timing because these events occurred over the Christmas break when all my kids were home from school and we could travel to NY for the funerals.
Things have been so different around here knowing that I can't talk to my mom or my grandpa. He was such a great man; my mom full of knowledge.
There have been struggles in trying to deal with elevated sugar levels since my surgery. Especially disheartening since I have been doing a bit more exercise, eating at home more often and just trying to watch my diet. I'm feel a bit discouraged by the higher numbers and inability to control those through medication, exercise and diet.
I feel lost, lonely, alone, sad, disheartened, discouraged. So many things. I know that God is always with me and will protect me when I am going through these things.So much of this has me just kind of up-in-arms.
I am happy and sad over my children growing, changing and becoming persons that they are called to be. I know that they each must go through things to help them grow and become loving, open, independent adults. I just don't necessarily like the process for me. I can only listen and encourage them as they go along with life at a pace that is coming like a herd of horses running across a field from delight.
Anyway, times will hit me and remind me of things that I honestly, have done wrong and just fail to take responsibility for and grow from. I think that I want to hang onto them....and know that I can't!
Our dogs (Allie and Baby) are just reminders that life is just that simple. Relax, depend on God and lay in his lap for comfort, warmth, strength and joy! It isn't hard to figure out! I need to remind myself of this fact more often!
In His love and peace
Things have been so different around here knowing that I can't talk to my mom or my grandpa. He was such a great man; my mom full of knowledge.
There have been struggles in trying to deal with elevated sugar levels since my surgery. Especially disheartening since I have been doing a bit more exercise, eating at home more often and just trying to watch my diet. I'm feel a bit discouraged by the higher numbers and inability to control those through medication, exercise and diet.
I feel lost, lonely, alone, sad, disheartened, discouraged. So many things. I know that God is always with me and will protect me when I am going through these things.So much of this has me just kind of up-in-arms.
I am happy and sad over my children growing, changing and becoming persons that they are called to be. I know that they each must go through things to help them grow and become loving, open, independent adults. I just don't necessarily like the process for me. I can only listen and encourage them as they go along with life at a pace that is coming like a herd of horses running across a field from delight.
Anyway, times will hit me and remind me of things that I honestly, have done wrong and just fail to take responsibility for and grow from. I think that I want to hang onto them....and know that I can't!
Our dogs (Allie and Baby) are just reminders that life is just that simple. Relax, depend on God and lay in his lap for comfort, warmth, strength and joy! It isn't hard to figure out! I need to remind myself of this fact more often!
In His love and peace
Saturday, June 15, 2013
On toward the future!
I guess that a good blogger doesn't forget to blog. I have been in a state of not wanting to be alone with my thoughts lately. I have been remembering things from the course of this last year recently along with the memories of my mother's passing nearly one year ago now.
I have sometimes recalled that things that have happened for the very purpose of changing both my mind and my attitude. Thinking upon lots of things sometimes is not very good for ones psyche. Other times, it can be great. Most of the time for me has been spent thinking of good times, events that are noteworthy to me and the future ahead.
I am looking this year at the graduation of my second child who will be attending school North of here and also still the attendance of my oldest, who will be a junior this coming fall in the South-west.
The youngest, who is still the only young teen in the house, still has another 4 years to go before we get him all set off to doing what ever it is that will determine his future.
Time sure has a way of changing really fast. It makes me sad and lonely to have more freedom now than I have had in quite some time - years, really. I am excited to see what the future holds for all the kids and know that things have to change for the sake of each and every one of them. It is scary also. Because, what if.....Oh, the 'What ifs?'.
Well, we can not determine what lies ahead for any of us, but we can know that with God's love, grace, mercy, direction and kindness, He knows exactly what all of that looks like. We sometimes forget to just help him and go along with His plan. Let us not forget to be ever so thankful each and every day, and every moment of every day that we are His creation. Created for His purpose and His pleasures. That we are to not forget where we come from and never to forget where we are going to.
Peace and Love.
I have sometimes recalled that things that have happened for the very purpose of changing both my mind and my attitude. Thinking upon lots of things sometimes is not very good for ones psyche. Other times, it can be great. Most of the time for me has been spent thinking of good times, events that are noteworthy to me and the future ahead.
I am looking this year at the graduation of my second child who will be attending school North of here and also still the attendance of my oldest, who will be a junior this coming fall in the South-west.
The youngest, who is still the only young teen in the house, still has another 4 years to go before we get him all set off to doing what ever it is that will determine his future.
Time sure has a way of changing really fast. It makes me sad and lonely to have more freedom now than I have had in quite some time - years, really. I am excited to see what the future holds for all the kids and know that things have to change for the sake of each and every one of them. It is scary also. Because, what if.....Oh, the 'What ifs?'.
Well, we can not determine what lies ahead for any of us, but we can know that with God's love, grace, mercy, direction and kindness, He knows exactly what all of that looks like. We sometimes forget to just help him and go along with His plan. Let us not forget to be ever so thankful each and every day, and every moment of every day that we are His creation. Created for His purpose and His pleasures. That we are to not forget where we come from and never to forget where we are going to.
Peace and Love.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Happiness
Happiness is not all about just being physically comfortable, and excited in the moment. Happiness, is about accepting things in your life that are not what we necessarily want and moving toward acceptance to all of them.
When we think we are happy with where we are, who we are and what we are doing, we might think twice about how that thought is getting us further toward living a life that is consistent with true acceptance and forgiveness. This forgiveness is something that we learn to be more content with ourselves and not being upset about things outside of our control.
Yes, we are human and make mistakes, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't still be happy about our lives or things that we can change to make ourselves better. Sometimes, we don't know what to change about ourselves unless others in our lives open up and tell us more about ourselves that can certainly enhance things in our own lives. We also cannot have happiness or forgiveness without the love of Jesus Christ in our lives.
This past Christmas has been a time when I have reflected on all of these things. Having family around and talking, there is certainly a new 'normal' since my Mother has passed on in July. We have all been affected by her passing and for me, this has given me a new perspective on how I handle family, friends and other relationships. I find that God has truly given me a very big blessing in my immediate family (ie - my husband and children). I have also seen so many other things that have been both good and bad. I realize that nothing can change me, except me!
Things are good all around me and I have to be willing to say, "You have no reason to complain about anything. You have such a good life and things are truly OK."
Change is never easy and require a lot of work. If I am not willing to do the work, I am never going to change and things around me may just turn out to be the same or worse than if I put a little more effort into becoming a better person and just work through the pain like someone in a new training regime.
When we think we are happy with where we are, who we are and what we are doing, we might think twice about how that thought is getting us further toward living a life that is consistent with true acceptance and forgiveness. This forgiveness is something that we learn to be more content with ourselves and not being upset about things outside of our control.
Yes, we are human and make mistakes, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't still be happy about our lives or things that we can change to make ourselves better. Sometimes, we don't know what to change about ourselves unless others in our lives open up and tell us more about ourselves that can certainly enhance things in our own lives. We also cannot have happiness or forgiveness without the love of Jesus Christ in our lives.
This past Christmas has been a time when I have reflected on all of these things. Having family around and talking, there is certainly a new 'normal' since my Mother has passed on in July. We have all been affected by her passing and for me, this has given me a new perspective on how I handle family, friends and other relationships. I find that God has truly given me a very big blessing in my immediate family (ie - my husband and children). I have also seen so many other things that have been both good and bad. I realize that nothing can change me, except me!
Things are good all around me and I have to be willing to say, "You have no reason to complain about anything. You have such a good life and things are truly OK."
Change is never easy and require a lot of work. If I am not willing to do the work, I am never going to change and things around me may just turn out to be the same or worse than if I put a little more effort into becoming a better person and just work through the pain like someone in a new training regime.
Fighting, for sure!
Yes, I agree with what the authors of "The Fight of Our Lives" had to say about what is happening in the world today in regard to battle that we face each and every day as true Christians who pursue after our own relationship with Christ. If we aren't careful, we can fall into some very large traps that have been set up for us everywhere.
When Liebsohn and Williams talk about all of the different characteristics of our walk and daily trial, I realize that the things they are speaking about come directly from the Bible which should be every Christians source for looking at anything happening in the end times.
So many little things happening come from the small area of our world and we aren't even aware of all of it until someone brings them about like these two have. Thanks for getting some of this information out because we can't always trust other media sources.
When Liebsohn and Williams talk about all of the different characteristics of our walk and daily trial, I realize that the things they are speaking about come directly from the Bible which should be every Christians source for looking at anything happening in the end times.
So many little things happening come from the small area of our world and we aren't even aware of all of it until someone brings them about like these two have. Thanks for getting some of this information out because we can't always trust other media sources.
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